11/5/08

Monitoring with my old RE

So....ya know I'm with CCRM now. They're in Denver, Colorado and I live in NJ. Clearly I need monitoring from a local RE. And since I'm on CD17 of a mock cycle, today was my lining check day.

Because I'm established with my old RE's office already, I decided to go there for monitoring. Yeah, I thought it would be awkward but it didn't quite zing me like when I walked in and realized it was my old doctor (who I really like, btw) who was on for morning monitoring today. Ugh! It was awkward as shit I tell you!

I sat in the room with the paper sheet over my legs and she walked in - pretty and sweet and gentle as always. I felt so badly. I'd been sweating it out before she entered, running through what I'd say, how I'd justify this, how embarassing it is to say the truth: CCRM's stats on a DE cycle is over 80% take-home-baby vs. this clinic's which is in the mid 60's. And I felt badly to even have to say that (though I shouldn't have - it's my money, my time, my body, my future baby and my business). But, still, I'm a good person who still has feelings.

And do you know what happened? Nothing. Dr. H walked in and said "oh hi, how are you - it's been a while" and I said "yeah, it's great seeing you" and she said she thought she recognized the name. Then she told me my lining was 9 mm, 3 follicles in right ovary (what a joke!) and none in left (bigger joke!) and detected what could be some endometriosis. Endometriosis 6 weeks after the laprascopic surgery that cleaned it out - HA! Now I'm doubled-over with laughter over the irony! Whatever!

So she finished and said "well, we'll get this over to wherever it needs to go" and "I wish you the best of luck" and, somehow, I knew it was heartfelt.

Once again, I freaked out and obsessively worried over nothing!

6 comments:

Me said...

We're women. It's what we do. ;)

Sky said...

Sad but oh so true!

Lorraine said...

It's nice that she was so gracious - she can't possibly blame you for maxing your odds. I hope it's a sign of the ease of things to come.

Anonymous said...

Found you through Bridges....

Wonder what's causing the big difference in the stats between clinics? Kind of makes me shudder...good for you for switching! Good luck to you!!

Sky said...

Jodie - I've wondered about the variance in stats too. I mean, I've actually wondered if women in Colorado are just healthier somehow, 'cause I don't know how else to account for it. Yes, CCRM does a LOT of testing and is unyielding but...25%+. It's a mystery.

Linda said...

Glad to hear that you can go to your old RE's office for monitoring. There is no way in hell that I'd go back to my old RE. Just too much bad blood there... I wish you success!! :)