Tolerance

I have this theory that when you grow up in apartment living (as I did), you develop an extraordinary amount of tolerance. And that's because you have to learn to co-exist peacefully with other human beings and you soon realize there is a balance of their shit and your shit that has to be mutually tolerated. For example, by nature, my family has a more booming voice than the upper crust whom speak at barely a whisper. And while that could be annoying to one neighbor, they likely do a few things my family had to learn to tolerate as well.

And all of my life I've lived in similar quarters (currently I own a townhouse) so I think I have an EXTREMELY tolerant personality. For me to actually confront someone on something....it's gotta be BIG.

Brings me to cubical life in big company. A chick who sits about 8 feet from me requires complete silence in order to work. And you know, that's just not feasible. People talk when they're on the phone. If they keep it to very low talking, she's okay. If it's me talking, with my definitely-louder voice, she walks over and asks me to "please try to keep it down." It's happened a few times already and I'm pissed and I'll tell you why.

It makes me feel scolded every time I use my natural voice. BUT FAR MORE IMPORTANTLY the reason it really chaps my ass is because this STUPID IDIOT doesn't even consider for a second that she does several annoying things that bother others. For example, she's had significant drama in her life and will park her ass in your cubical to talk your ear off about her personal problems. She sucks air through her teeth while she's eating and for an hour afterwards - CONSTANTLY. She has this habit of flicking her fingernails with her thumb and the sound is distracting.

But, have I ever even once brought any of those annoying behaviors to her attention?! ABSOLUTELY NOT. Because I understand that in close quarters you NEED to deal with annoying habits of others and, in turn, they need to deal with yours.

Now, if your annoying habit is to never bathe or wear deodorant (I actually worked near the nicest little Indian man whose body odor could bring tears to your eyes from ten feet away!), maybe Human Resources needs to gently counsel you.

So I want to blow up at her and say "You're more dense than I gave you credit for - how stupid can you be that you don't even fathom that you yourself may do various things that are so annoying to other people but because those things - of course - don't annoy you, you can't imagine it's possible you aren't pissing off other people - so deal with me and I'll deal with you!"